| (no subject) |
[Mar. 3rd, 2009|05:27 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  exhausted | ] |
I know I've strayed from this site for a really long time. I probably won't post here much anymore as well because I just don't remember anymore. So I'm going to leave you with two places I frequent daily if you really need to keep in touch or just wonder what I've been up to. Life has taken me and thrown my ass into the fire we'll say. I'm on a soul searching adventure to pull out of the ashes and be reborn a better soul. I've had my share of things and its time to finally bury the old and set out with the new. May the hurt, pain, and emotional bullshit be forgotten much like everything else in the world.
http://www.myspace.com/lady_saissis
http://www.facebook.com/
I'll friend you under the assumption you do message me saying who you are. If you don't tell me I'll probably not add you. Thanks so much.
~Lady S |
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| I need advice/help |
[Sep. 18th, 2008|07:29 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  worried | ] |
First off Vista is the bane of my existence. I just want to point this out to everyone now. Secondly, I'm at a rock and a hard place with this piece of shit right now and I want advice.
Since January the system has not shut down on its own and refuses to. It simply hangs at the shutdown screen for what seems an Eternity. So every time I have to shut the comp down its a hard shutdown by manually holding in the power button. I realize this is unhealthy for a computer but with my parents breathing down my neck about electric costs I can't leave her in sleep mode either all the time.
Secondly, she will not accept her updates and goes into fits trying to revert back to its original setting. So the comp isn't getting the information that it should anymore.
Now the computer is starting to blue screen and I know that is bad. God forbid I've lost how many in the damned past due to the "blue screen of death". So help me I'm fed up and worried I'm going to loose yet another system. I just don't know what to do to help the computer get itself back on track.
Please for the love of whatever is holy will someone help me figure out why my computer is acting like this? I loose internet I might as well take a good hiatus away from everyone. Frankly with no long distance here I'm extremely isolated from the world and all my friends.
Help please T_T |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 10th, 2008|09:29 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  melancholy | ] |
I'm just posting a message this morning letting you all know my aunt passed away last night in her sleep. She's not suffering anymore but I know my dad is taking it pretty hard since its his closest sister. I'm just meh on the whole thing because though I loathe my family... she was the one that babysit me when I was little. I didn't think this would hit me like it is though *sighs* |
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| and in the Gaia Realm... |
[May. 21st, 2008|07:43 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | ... | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  amused | ] |
| [ | music |
| | ... | ] |
Wonder why those two are so stoned... could it be because of... *grins*
Whoo my little girl is finally going to make me a grandmother *feels proud* |
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| Oh before I forget... |
[Feb. 22nd, 2008|10:38 am] |
Since I may start posting in this thing again... though I do loathe the curses it puts on me... I need replies of who wants to stay on my friend's list and why. Everything for the most part will be "friend's only" so I need to know who's still with me. Most of you (yes you know who you are) will stay of course since I couldn't make it without you guys *snugs*
As for the rest or whomever sees fit post a reply why you think you should stay and I'll make a note. By March 11, 2008 which is my birthday I will delete out those that no longer care. I just feel it's time for a change... Please let me know... or fear Chibi Sasuke's cuteness ^.^
~Lady S |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 19th, 2008|09:58 am] |
Its strange how I stray away from this thing and still I've gotten the urge to write once more because Muse tells me to. Same goes for my roleplaying on Gaia and coloring inspiration. Muse has been a sweet little inspiration yet she takes so many vacations when I really don't want her to *sighs*
Seeing its the begining of the year (well for me still at least) I suppose I should update and keep others from worrying about me. Though I really wonder who does anymore... senseless thought I know.
Anyway, lets start with the basics shall we? First off my parents have been in this fighting match for quite a while now. Every day I wake up to the same crap of yelling and screaming which might I add is mostly my mother. Dad seems to think he can control her in the spending department, and frankly she's gotten fed up with it to a point of hatred and loathing. Day in and day out I hear things that sicken my stomach more and more. To top this off dad is borderline permanent diabetic and refuses to listen to anyone regarding the situation. Not even the doctor can make him listen. He just wants to consume everything that he shouldn't and if its not accessible here, he just goes out and buys it somewhere else. He always says how he doesn't care or he thinks he should leave like a reprimanded prisoner. To tell you the truth, its tearing my mother apart that he even acts this way. So yeah homelife from hell... teacups full of firewater and brimstone in this snug little abode.
I hate it! I hate being here dealing with this garbage. The only reason I moved back is because I sucked in my pride and realized I stumbled worse than I knew trying to be independent on my own. But when one person is footing the finances it never works and you slowly drown until you're a babbling corpse wishing for life. Been there, done that, its the past not the present, onward to a new frontier. At least the credit cards from hell are slowly being paid off and my student loan has been on time for almost two years now. In that view I feel more confident about being a bit responsible at least.
Then there's my hobbies which some of you know I've gotten ridiculously addicted to watching Naruto since Walmart had the boxsets for 25.00 a piece. I've sat and enjoyed the series in uncut form and I can say that Cartoon Network has destroyed yet another good anime with a plot for once. So call me a Narutard or whatever you want... I like the anime *breathes easier*
Then Gaia still resides in my life of course where I practice new coloring patterns and bring my horses to life. Talking like that I remind myself of when I was little *chuckles*
I finally got my Pharaoh Atemu and Tamahome soquili and all is good. There's two more coming that I won't say what they are, but when they do I will feel complete except a certain couple and a merhorse yet.
Other than that I'm looking forward to Tekko and Otakon hopefully as time shouldn't be an issue. I really need to get a hold of a watering can to start on Suiseiseki's "sui dream" before August. So I think I'll trod off to bed now that I've gotten a bit off my chest. Better than curling in a ball and wishing the world would fade away. Trust me its not as nice as it sounds.
Let the sun shine through.
~Lady S
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 8th, 2007|10:43 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | ~ | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | worried | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Enya~ May it Be | ] |
May It Be
May it be an evening star
Shines down upon you
May it be when darkness falls
Your heart will be true
You walk a lonely road
Oh! How far you are from home
Mornie utúlië (darkness has come)
Believe and you will find your way
Mornie alantië (darkness has fallen)
A promise lives within you now
May it be shadows call
Will fly away
May it be your journey on
To light the day
When the night is overcome
You may rise to find the sun
Mornie utúlië (darkness has come)
Believe and you will find your way
Mornie alantië (darkness has fallen)
A promise lives within you now
A promise lives within you now
Composed and performed by Enya |
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| News about Mother |
[Dec. 8th, 2007|10:11 am] |
Its amazing how snow can really start bringing out the upcoming holiday like it has been. I've been quite in the festive mood buying presents and what not. I even gifted my own Soquili on Gaia with a breeding this month because she means the world to me. But, even through my festive nature some things can bring a person to their knees, almost to the buckling point. For you see mom hasn't been doing that well with her breathing as of late.
Thursday morning she was rushed to the hospital because her asthma got really bad and uncontrollable. Nothing it seemed in the treatments even somewhat opened her up so she could breathe better. So, they admitted her in till supposedly Saturday. When we tried calling for updates things were unknown and unsettled. So, dad visited mom yesterday to see her progress, maybe a glimmer of hope they created a miracle and she was coming home.
She called me friday as I was getting ready to head to bed, since I'd not slept but 3-4 hours Thursday before work. She sounded the same, still gasping for air and trying to cope with what she had. She asked me to do a few chores and watch after the cats, and to e-mail her friends which I don't mind.
Today is now Saturday and I awoke to my father saying mom isn't doing so well today. None of the treatments are working and she may have to be kept even longer possibly. Later today we shall go to the hospital once more and check on her for an update.
I know I'm 33 years old but I feel like a child right now wondering what's going to happen, fearing something may come if this doesn't clear up. I want to cry, hide my head even, not face what could be coming. But, in this time where I'm unsure about things I need to be strong, face what could rear its ugly head. I'm so saddened that she may be on an oxygen tank for the rest of the month at this rate. What if she doesn't come home for Christmas I ponder with each bated breath. I've dealt with bad things before, but the simple thought of losing her is breaking me. She's the stability of this household and keeps balance, the mediator between my father and I. If we loose her things will go in disarray and anything could happen. I don't want to feel like this, feel weak and inferior to current things that I can't handle. I just want her home safe and sound like it was before.
So, even though I'm not fully religious, I'm still praying to whatever deity oversees this world. To bring her home safely and bring us together for the holidays.
Please mom, get well soon.... you are missed greatly.
~Love LS |
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| AUSA 2007: finally back whoot |
[Nov. 18th, 2007|11:05 pm] |
Eventful. There's my one word that describes this weekend. Filled with complications, stress, and laughs galore is my opinion of this wonderful vacation of mine. Granted I don't remember everything, and frankly I don't expect myself to. I really don't feel like writing a novel either because I'm tired as hell. So I'll be frank and write highlights for each day that stick out the most in my mind.
( AUSA Mini con report ) |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 13th, 2007|08:56 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | somewhere | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  bouncy | ] |
One of the greatest surprises that tells me I still have luck embedded somewhere with me.
Congrats Andromeda... I'm dying to see what babies you shall have^^ |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 13th, 2007|08:18 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | somewhere | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | amused | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Kyo Kara Maoh! Madness | ] |
When sleep deprivation, wild color commissions, and a wild laughing fit occur there is only one thing that will happen *grins* I laugh till I can't stop...
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ladys's journal
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